A Valentine Mystery

By: Shirley Lovell

As Valentines Day is drawing near
The strangest things occour.
Some dormant prehistoric urge
Within a male will stir.

It causes wise and noble guys
To act like suckers fool
And macho men, who rate a ten,
To whimper, beg and drool.

And men, who never look at flowers,
Will spend their pay on roses
Then lather on enough cologne
To wilt a hundred noses.

They buy romantic cards with hearts
Proclaiming such devotion.
While they cant budge from off that couch,
They swear they'd swim the ocean.

Why do they shower, shave and preen
And dress to cause a riot
Then buy six pounds of chocolate for
A girl who's on a diet.

And guys who simply live in jeans,
Love burgers, fries and beer,
Dress up in a fancy suit and tie
To wine and dine. It's queer!

We've felt that Cupids arrows were
Involved in this somehow,
But why they had this strange effect
We didn't know 'till now.

But scientists have figured out
Through study, work and toil
These tiny arrows have been dipped
In good old Caster Oil.

Shirley lovell 2001